How to become more thankful in our lives?

Many people in my life,  since I have provided counseling to thousands of men, women and children, though I don't counsel very young children but children of fourteen, fifteen or sixteen years of age.

So what happens is that they experienced something painful in their lives. Something very painful And they tell me, Sir, this and this and that happened with me Then I ask them, "what is your age now?" Suppose they tell me twenty-seven years. Then I ask them to calculate how many days or hours it lasted, whatever happened. Calculate everything. And I even ask them to exaggerate in their calculation.

And when they calculate we translate that into days and then into years and come to know that out of twenty-seven years of life, perhaps only one year was a bad one. Even one year is a lot. For twenty-six years of your life, nothing bad happened. Then I ask him how many people in all mistreated you? He will say so and so and so. So how many altogether? Count everyone and make a list.

 The total comes to ten if you count everyone. Then I ask him, how many people you have met in your life since your childhood? Rough idea. We ask him to calculate and find out that he has met thousands of people. Out of those only ten mistreated him. The rest were good people. Praise be to Allah. Whatever you are given and whatever good happened, feel it and everything will be fine. 

And if you keep remembering the setbacks and whatever you did not get, then everything will be in disarray and as a result, we will not be grateful. Is it clear? What do you think? To create an ability to be grateful, I will give you a practical activity. We are doing it for improving our minds.

How many of you have someone in their acquaintances, It can be a friend or a relative or anyone among your acquaintances who financially is at a level that is four times lower than your financial status. That means if you earn a hundred thousand rupees, he earns only twenty-five thousand.

 If you are living in a thousand Sq. yards or two canal house, then he is living in a ten marlas house. Or if you have a ten marlas house then he has only two or three marlas house. Financially he is at a level that is four times lower than you. 

How many people do you know? 

So you know some. You should be grateful to Allah SWT. And for those who don't know such a person, whom I described in my question. If you don't have such a person in your aquaintances then your lifestyle is risky and you are leading a very dangerous life. There are such people in the society of course. 

What  you need to do is to build relationships with such people. How can our psychological position remain stable? For this, our Prophet (peace be upon him) has given us the method. With regards your financial position, who should we look at? The one who is below your level. (audience) And regarding the spiritual matters and good deeds, who should we look at? The one who is higher than you. But we do just the opposite. 

Regarding financial matters, we keep looking at the one who has a BMW and regarding the spiritual position, we look at the one who has not yet performed the Hajj. Everyone has made a list. There are eleven people among his acquaintances who should have performed Hajj but they did not. Whenever someone returns after performing Hajj I tell them if you have such a list building in your mind then beware that your Hajj has started to go waste.

Because you will at once remember that so and so and so have not performed Hajj whereas I have done it. And if you perform Umrah as well then you will think that you have performed Umrah even and they have not performed their Hajj. Are you getting me? This is a big problem with us. Is it not? I will tell you what your most urgent need is. 

Let me tell you something first. If you can find a person with both the qualities in him. Financially he is one-fourth of your status or even lower. If you earn a hundred thousand then he earns only twenty or twenty-five thousand. But he is much higher in beneficence and goodness.He offers his prayers very calmly and his dealings are straightforward. 

He has written his will at the age of thirty. Alright? He does not delay his affairs even for a single day. He is absolutely clean and pure and a simple person. Financially he is at a lower level but morally he is very high up.  In goodness, he is way up.  

There cannot be a bigger beneficent for you in the whole universe.  In the whole universe you will not find a more beneficent person for you. If you find such a person,  invite him to your home as a guest and respect him. 

Treat him as a guest 

as you will treat someone whose financial status 

is four times higher than you. 

If you earn a hundred thousand and you have a guest 

who earns four hundred thousand. The way you will treat this guest, 

the same way you should treat the one with twenty-five thousand salary.

Is it getting clear? 

Give him that protocol and respect. 

And similarly, visit him without putting him through any trouble  

but do visit him with your kids and family 

so that everyone comes to their senses.  Sit with him in a room. In your house there is a six year old sofa set which your wife does not like.  

Or your children or you yourself don't like it  

whereas this person does not have a sofa set. So everyone will realize that some people live like this.

What do you think? 

They feel a four bedroom house is not enough and this person has only one room. So when they go there, it will open their eyes and they will realize that a four room house is more than they need. 

It will create gratefulness. What do you think? 

is it getting clear?